the alternative weblog
   
entry 63 - 5th March 02

today
last week
what's new?
archive

about
characters
south coast
guestbook

email

« seethru


   

clever clever boy

I was lazing about on the beach drawing loads of pointless helicopter diagrams when I noticed a bloke, his girlfriend, and their dog down at the shore-line.

She was searching for shells, while he was throwing stones for the dog. He threw one into the sea, quite far out, and the dog took the plunge, paddling out to where it had splashed. When it finally got there, it trod water and looked in a doggishly confused manner back at the shore.

The bloke dutifully picked up another fist-sized stone and lobbed it roughly in the direction of the dog.

And this was the funny bit: it was over in a matter of moments, but an unbelievable amount of emotion and panic was squeezed into each frame...

(1) As soon as the rock left the bloke's hand it was obvious that it was on a collision course with his dog's head. He realised this at the same moment I did, i.e. within three pico-seconds.

(2) The dog's expression was still one of blissful ignorance - it could see there was an incoming rock, but it hadn't computed anything beyond this fact.

(3) The bloke sort of shuffled forwards momentarily, as if he was toying with the idea of diving in, swimming out 50 yards, and intercepting the rock.

(4) Appreciating the futility of this course of action the bloke then did the only thing he could do given the circumstances... he glanced over at his girlfriend, to make sure she wasn't watching.

(5) She wasn't. He turned his gaze back to the dog and grimaced as the rock completed its trajectory. The dog went under the water with a yelp, which alerted the bloke's girlfriend.

(6) "Where's Chuffy?" she shouted, dropping her shells. "He's gone under the water," replied the bloke in a calming tone which implied that dogs often swim underwater.

(7) About fifteen seconds later the dog emerged from beneath the waves and paddled frantically back to the shore, where it shook itself dry, gasping for breath and extremely unsteady on its feet. "Clever boy," beamed the girl, patting him right where the rock had struck him. "Clever boy," said the bloke.

Duncan

top | back to seethru zine
this week » 1 2 3 4 5
leave a comment about the south coast diaries »
back to seethru zine »
back to seethru home »
this week
01 Death
02 The Sea
03
Bag Of Nerves
04 The Big Day
05 Friday


last week

entries
| 72 | 71 | 72 | 73 | 74 |
|
70 | 69 | 68 | 67 | 66 |
|
65 | 64 | 63 | 62 | 61 |
|
60 | 59 | 58 | 57 | 56 |
|
55 | 54 | 53 | 52 | 51 |
|
50 | 49 | 48 | 47 | 46 |
|
45 | 44 | 43 | 42 | 41 |
|
40 | 39 | 38 | 37 | 36 |
|
35 | 34 | 33 | 32 | 31 |
|
30 | 29 | 28 | 27 | 26 |
|
25 | 24 | 23 | 22 | 21 |
|
20 | 19 | 18 | 17 | 16 |
|
15 | 14 | 13 | 12 | 11 |
|
10 | 09 | 08 | 07 | 06 |
|
05 | 04 | 03 | 02 | 01 |


contribute
» The Doleite Gallery
submit your crap view

» Crap-O-Graphs
draw us some rubbish diagrams

» The Hastings CiderSpace Gallery
invent some brands of cider

classic South Coast








 

 






>


[home] [zine] [music] [weblog] [games] [e-cards] [shop] [talk]
[about us] [what's new] [site manifesto] [email us]

all content © 2002 seethru.co.uk : all the usual rights : hosted by mirahost