|
|
 |
 |
brendan vs cash converters and
the rac
I met Brendan in town, and he had this well wicked
Sony digital stills camera - worth about a grand and brand spanking new.
 And
it was actually kosher, too: Brendan was just borrowing it for the day,
off one of Suzie's mates. We decided, for a laugh, to take it into Cash
Converters to see what paltry sum we'd be offered.
The bloke behind the counter clearly thought we'd nicked
it, which we'd expected, and so we layed it on with a shovel, looking
and sounding as shifty as possible...
"Where did you get it?" he asked.
"About a couple of weeks ago," I said.
"No, no, no, I said WHERE did you get it?" he said.
"Er, I dunno," I replied.
"You don't know where you got it?"
"Er, no," I said.
"Off a bloody mate," said Brendan.
"I see," said Mr Cash Converter, who then took the camera into
the back office. An age passed, whereupon a small army of assistants emerged,
all hanging onto a part of the camera.
"We can give you forty quid," said a tall spotty one.
Brendan declined, obviously, and it was quite a hard task actually getting
the camera back off them, by which time they'd upped their offer to fifty.
During the exchange the camera went off and we got a picture.
On the way back to Brendan's we were accosted by a
pair of RAC street salesmen, desperate to sell us anything at all. I could
see Brendan moving into total bullshit mode...
Brendan: I've got cover already mate, with the bloody
AA. Mind you, I'm not happy with them.
Salesman: Sir, if you're unhappy with the AA there's absolutely
no reason to stay with them. We can offer you fully customisable cover
in a variety of easy to pay packages.
Brendan: Good job. I drive all around the world, mate, all the
bloody way around.
Salesman: In your own car?
Brendan: Too bloody right, mate. I trade diamonds and furs. Name
any country in the world and I've done business there. That's why I'm
not happy with the AA. They've let me down once too often. How much is
the best, most comprehensive package you got?
Salesman: Let me see...
Brendan: (Looking at watch). Hey, I'm bloody going to be late.
Tell you what buddy, I'll give you my number.
Salesman: Okay sir.
Brendan: It's a long one... I live in Poland.
Salesman: (Pen at the ready). Fire away.
Brendan: Zero one one three, seven six four, nine two six six five,
zero two five, three six six, nine two nine.
Salesman: Three six six, nine two nine. Okay sir, I'll...
Brendan: There's more.
Salesman: Oh.
Brendan: Seven seven two, nine zero nine two five, eight eight
one, eight eight three, two two one five.
Salesman: ...Two two one five. Thank you. I'll...
Brendan: Four nine zero four, two six two seven three, four zero
five zero six six nine, eight two, six five, one zero one zero one nine
two, six six six, three two five nine, three one four two eight.
Salesman: Three one four two eight. Er...
Brendan: That's it. Do you want my address? That's a long one as
well.
Salesman: No, it's okay sir, I'll phone.
And with that we were off. I finished telling Brendan about
the radio controlled Corsair I was intending to buy and arranged for him
to meet up with me at Geordie's on Sunday. I'm now about to take the last
bit of Tim-tom's 'grass'. Because there's such a tiny amount left I'm
going to eat it again. (I've been smoking little strands for a while and
I know I can handle it better now).
Duncan
|
|
|
