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the internet is about
freedom - freedom of speech, freedom from governments, and above
all - freedom from your goddamn parents
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Aaaargh.
It had to happen. My dad's on-line.
It
was only a matter of time before he was caught in the waves of free
Internet sweeping up and down the country. It was only a matter of
months before the daily Net-this Web-that on the TV, radio, in films,
and all over the newspapers got him. Then he realised that he could
send me messages. At work....
"Jake. As
I sat on your settee last night I considered the bare facts. At your
age I owned one shoe shop and was about to open another. I'd been
married to your mother for three years and we were expecting our first
child. What has gone wrong with you?"
There's something weird and uncomfortable about the idea of your dad
surfing around the Internet.
It's like he's invaded your terrain and is doing something only young
people should be doing, like having sex or wearing a puffy jacket.
It's like he can see what you're doing. Now he can get you.
Instead of phoning, he emails. "How you doing, son?" they say. "How
about coming home this weekend?" And instead of claiming your ansaphone's
not working, or your flatmate forgot to give you the message, I have
to answer him - within the requisite Netiquette 48 hours.
Worse still, my dad visited my website, noticed the use of the
words 'piss' and 'fuck' therein, and promptly ex-communicated me for
bringing the family in disrepute.
"Dad," I pleaded, "The Internet is about freedom of speech. Freedom
from governments, freedom from society, and - above all - freedom
from your goddamn parents."
It didn't wash. Even on the communications medium which will lead
us into the next millenium, your parents will find out what you're
doing and disapprove
by
Jake
some of my
dad's emails:
1 You
young people don't understand romance
2 What's
wrong with a suit and a pair of brogues?
3 Good
manners cost nothing - even online
4 When
are you going to mend my laptop?
5 When
will you get a proper job?
6 Why
is your generation so childish?
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