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entry 56 - 25th February 02
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wrecked
sorry for long delay in updating - click here for a "story so far" bit

Today couldn't have gone more badly. My plane is wrecked.

I got the bus over to Sisbury Ring earlier with the Corsair and a giant watermelon. I was inspired by a scene from Day Of The Jackal: the one where the assassin was setting up the telescopic sights on his rifle, using a distant watermelon to simulate General de Gaulle's head.

Except today the watermelon was going to be Tim-tom's skull.

I balanced it on the top of a fencepost and retreated about 100 yards, back up the hill. My thinking was that the exterior of the watermelon was about half as hard as Tim-tom's skull, so I was going to fly the Corsair into it at half speed to see what happened. It wasn't exactly rocket science, but I reckoned I'd get a rough idea as to the effectiveness of a full speed plane on a real head.

I flew the plane to a point quite high behind me, put it into a steep banked turn, straightened it up, aimed it as well as I could, cut the power to 50%, and then held my breath as I guided it in.

The engine cut out and I hit the fucking fencepost. The Corsair became a 3D jigsaw puzzle which even all the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't have put together again.

The only bit I bothered bringing home was the engine.

Oh, and the radio unit, of course.

Oh, and the watermelon, which I'm eating as I write.

Fucking watermelons.

Duncan

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